The language of emotions: key to conscious leadership
Emotions are a big part of our daily lives. Have you ever thought about how the way we talk about them shapes how we feel? The words we choose to describe our emotions are more than just labels. They help us interpret what we’re experiencing, understand the world around us, and strengthen our relationships.
In this post, I explore why naming emotions accurately is so important for conscious leadership. I’ll also look at how this skill can help you handle challenges, build stronger connections and make the most of opportunities.
What are emotions really?
There’s a common belief that emotions are universal and hardwired, but research shows this isn’t the case. For years, people thought everyone experienced the same basic emotions, but studies by Professor Lisa Feldman Barrett show emotions are created by the brain.
Her theory of constructed emotion explains that emotions aren’t fixed. They are shaped by how the brain interprets what’s happening in the body. For example, the sensation of a racing heart and a fluttery stomach could be excitement in one context or anxiety in another.
Emotions are influenced by things like personal experiences, cultural norms and the situation you’re in. This shows us how important it is to pay attention to the way we describe our feelings.
Why emotional granularity matters
Naming your emotions clearly and precisely is a skill known as emotional granularity. Research shows this skill helps you handle stress better, feel less anxious and even improve your physical health.
When you label emotions accurately, you can understand what’s really causing them. This gives you clarity to take action, rather than feeling overwhelmed or stuck.
Reframing emotions makes a difference
The way you talk about emotions has a big impact on how you see them. By interpreting and labelling feelings in a constructive way, you can boost your confidence and approach challenges with a better mindset.
For example, let’s think about public speaking. Many people feel their heart racing, stomach churning and mouth getting dry before stepping up to speak. It’s common to call this feeling “nerves,” which can make the experience feel even harder. But if you reframe those same sensations as “excitement,” it shifts your focus to what you’re about to achieve rather than what could go wrong.
Challenges with emotional language
Building emotional vocabulary takes effort, and there are a few obstacles that get in the way.
1. Cultural norms: In some environments, expressing emotions isn’t encouraged. This can make it harder to explore how we feel.
2. Lack of education: Most of us weren’t taught emotional skills in school or at work. Without practice, it’s tough to name and understand our feelings.
The good news is these challenges can be overcome. By noticing how your body feels, expanding your vocabulary for emotions and using tools to explore your feelings, you can make real progress.
How emotions improve leadership
Conscious leadership is all about being self-aware and intentional. Leaders who understand and label their emotions clearly bring valuable benefits to their teams.
Naming emotions improves self-awareness and helps leaders set an example for handling feelings thoughtfully.
Recognising that everyone experiences emotions differently makes leaders more empathetic and inclusive.
Understanding emotions reduces emotional contagion. This is when stress or negativity spreads from one person to another, which can impact the team.
Reframing emotions helps leaders face challenges with confidence and inspire the same attitude in their teams.
By using emotional language effectively, leaders can create a supportive environment where teams can thrive.
Reflection questions
Emotions carry important messages. The way we describe them shapes how we handle them. By taking the time to name and reframe your emotions, you can approach challenges with confidence and clarity.
What emotions would you like to see differently? How would using more precise or constructive language change how you feel and act?
